咚咚语音公众号,在线yue

“有没有连麦睡觉的？找个人一起睡觉。”

15分钟前，我发了这条动态。

今天是我下载空空语音的第28天，每天晚上我都想找一个连麦睡觉的人。

睡觉前聊几句生活琐事，然后互道晚安，慢慢睡着。

听着手机那边传来的细细的呼吸声，翻身时身体与床单的摩擦声，让心情慢慢沉静下来。

然而今天找的过程却异常漫长。

发完动态，等待回复，或者主动去找一些连麦睡觉的人都无果后。

就在我快要放弃的时候，我刷到一个声音和初恋有点像的女孩。

我的初恋，自从高中毕业，已经7年没见了。

我承认，我像个小偷，只想偷了这声音私藏。

上次咱们讲到了：

SirThomaswaspreparingtoactuponthisletter,withoutcommunicatingitscontentstoanycreatureatMansfield,whenitwasfollowedbyanother,sentexpressfromthesamefriend,tobreaktohimthealmostdesperatesituationinwhichaffairsthenstoodwiththeyoungpeople.Mrs.Rushworthhadleftherhusband'shouse:Mr.Rushworthhadbeeningreatangeranddistress26tohim(Mr.Harding)forhisadvice;Mr.Hardingfearedtherehadbeenatleastveryflagrantindiscretion.ThemaidservantofMrs.Rushworth,senior,threatenedalarmingly.Hewasdoingallinhispowertoquieteverything,withthehopeofMrs.Rushworth'sreturn,butwassomuchcounteracted28inWimpoleStreetbytheinfluenceofMr.Rushworth'smother,thattheworstconsequencesmightbeapprehended29.Thisdreadfulcommunicationcouldnotbekeptfromtherestofthefamily.SirThomassetoff,Edmundwouldgowithhim,andtheothershadbeenleftinastateofwretchedness,inferioronlytowhatfollowedthereceiptofthenextlettersfromLondon.Everythingwasbythattimepublicbeyondahope.TheservantofMrs.Rushworth,themother,hadexposureinherpower,andsupportedbyhermistress,wasnottobesilenced.Thetwoladies,evenintheshorttimetheyhadbeentogether,haddisagreed;andthebitternessoftheelderagainstherdaughter-in-lawmightperhapsarisealmostasmuchfromthepersonaldisrespectwithwhichshehadherselfbeentreatedasfromsensibilityforherson.Howeverthatmightbe,shewasunmanageable.Buthadshebeenlessobstinate30,oroflessweightwithherson,whowasalwaysguidedbythelastspeaker,bythepersonwhocouldgetholdofandshuthimup,thecasewouldstillhavebeenhopeless,forMrs.Rushworthdidnotappearagain,andtherewaseveryreasontoconcludehertobeconcealed31somewherewithMr.Crawford,whohadquittedhisuncle'shouse,asforajourney,ontheverydayofherabsentingherself.SirThomas,however,remainedyetalittlelongerintown,inthehopeofdiscoveringandsnatchingherfromfarthervice27,thoughallwaslostonthesideofcharacter.HispresentstateFannycouldhardlybeartothinkof.Therewasbutoneofhischildrenwhowasnotatthistimeasourceofmisery32tohim.Tom'scomplaintshadbeengreatlyheightenedbytheshockofhissister'sconduct,andhisrecoverysomuchthrownbackbyit,thatevenLadyBertramhadbeenstruckbythedifference,andallheralarmswereregularlysentofftoherhusband;andJulia'selopement,theadditionalblowwhichhadmethimonhisarrivalinLondon,thoughitsforcehadbeendeadenedatthemoment,must,sheknew,besorelyfelt.Shesawthatitwas.Hislettersexpressedhowmuchhedeplored33it.Underanycircumstancesitwouldhavebeenanunwelcomealliance;buttohaveitsoclandestinely34formed,andsuchaperiodchosenforitscompletion,placedJulia'sfeelingsinamostunfavourablelight,andseverely35aggravated36thefolly37ofherchoice.Hecalleditabadthing,doneintheworstmanner,andattheworsttime;andthoughJuliawasyetasmorepardonablethanMariaasfollythanvice,hecouldnotbutregardthestepshehadtakenasopeningtheworstprobabilitiesofaconclusionhereafterlikehersister's.Suchwashisopinionofthesetintowhichshehadthrownherself.Fannyfeltforhimmostacutely.HecouldhavenocomfortbutinEdmund.Everyotherchildmustberackinghisheart.Hisdispleasureagainstherselfshetrusted,reasoningdifferentlyfromMrs.Norris,wouldnowbedoneaway.Sheshouldbejustified38.Mr.Crawfordwouldhavefully39acquitted40herconductinrefusinghim;butthis,thoughmostmaterialtoherself,wouldbepoorconsolationtoSirThomas.Heruncle'sdispleasurewasterribletoher;butwhatcouldherjustification41orhergratitude42andattachment43doforhim?HisstaymustbeonEdmundalone.Shewasmistaken,however,insupposingthatEdmundgavehisfathernopresentpain.Itwasofamuchlesspoignant44naturethanwhattheothersexcited;butSirThomaswasconsideringhishappinessasverydeeplyinvolvedintheoffenceofhissisterandfriend;cutoffbyit,ashemustbe,fromthewomanwhomhehadbeenpursuingwithundoubtedattachmentandstrongprobabilityofsuccess;andwho,ineverythingbutthisdespicablebrother,wouldhavebeensoeligible45aconnexion.HewasawareofwhatEdmundmustbesufferingonhisownbehalf,inadditiontoalltherest,whentheywereintown:hehadseenorconjectured46hisfeelings;and,havingreasontothinkthatoneinterviewwithMissCrawfordhadtakenplace,fromwhichEdmundderived47onlyincreaseddistress,hadbeenasanxiousonthataccountasonotherstogethimoutoftown,andhadengagedhimintakingFannyhometoheraunt,withaviewtohisreliefandbenefit,nolessthantheirs.Fannywasnotinthesecretofheruncle'sfeelings,SirThomasnotinthesecretofMissCrawford'scharacter.Hadhebeenprivy48toherconversationwithhisson,hewouldnothavewishedhertobelongtohim,thoughhertwentythousandpoundshadbeenforty.ThatEdmundmustbeforeverdividedfromMissCrawforddidnotadmitofadoubtwithFanny;andyet,tillsheknewthathefeltthesame,herownconvictionwasinsufficient49.Shethoughthedid,butshewantedtobeassuredofit.Ifhewouldnowspeaktoherwiththeunreservewhichhadsometimesbeentoomuchforherbefore,itwouldbemostconsoling;butthatshefoundwasnottobe.Sheseldomsawhim:neveralone.Heprobablyavoidedbeingalonewithher.Whatwastobeinferred?Thathisjudgment50submittedtoallhisownpeculiar51andbittershareofthisfamilyaffliction,butthatitwastookeenlyfelttobeasubjectoftheslightestcommunication.Thismustbehisstate.Heyielded,butitwaswithagonieswhichdidnotadmitofspeech.Long,longwoulditbeereMissCrawford'snamepassedhislipsagain,orshecouldhopeforarenewal52ofsuchconfidential53intercourse54ashadbeen.

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