留学动态│招生官认可的优秀文书是什么样的?(六)

I hate the letter “S”. Of the 164,777 words with “S”, I only grapple with one. To condemn an entire letter because of its use 0.0006% of the time sounds statistically absurd, but that one case changed 100% of my life. I used to have two parents, but now I have one, and the “S” in “parents” isn’t going anywhere.

在164777个带“S”的单词中，我只对其中一个深恶痛绝。因为仅有0.0006%的使用概率而“憎恶”一个字母听起来很荒谬，但它彻底地改变了我的整个人生。曾经，我也拥有两个父母（parents），但现在陪伴我的只有一个（parent），而“parents”中的“S”却永远不会消失。

“S” follows me. I can’t get through a day without being reminded that while my friends went out to dinner with their parents, I ate with my parent. As I write this essay, there is a blue line under the word “parent” telling me to check my grammar; even Grammarly assumes that I should have parents, but cancer doesn’t listen to edit suggestions. I won’t claim that my situation is as unique as 1 in 164,777, but it is still an exception to the rule - an outlier. The world isn’t meant for this special case.

The world wouldn’t abandon “S” because of me, so I tried to abandon “S”. I could get away from “S” if I stayed busy; you can’t have dinner with your “parent” (thanks again, Grammarly) if you’re too busy to have family dinner. Any spare time that I had, I filled. I became known as the “busy kid”- the one that everyone always asks, “How do you have time?” Morning meetings, classes, after school meetings, volleyball practice, dance class, rehearsal in Boston, homework, sleep, repeat. Though my specific schedule has changed over time, the busyness has not. I couldn’t fill the loss that “S” left in my life, but I could at least make sure I didn’t have to think about it. There were so many things in my life that I couldn’t control, so I controlled what I could- my schedule. I never succumbed to the stress of potentially over-committing. I thrived. It became a challenge to juggle it all, but I’d soon find a rhythm. But rhythm wasn’t what I wanted. Rhythm may not have an “S”, but “S” sure liked to come by when I was idle. So, I added another ball, and another, and another. Soon I noticed that the same “color” balls kept falling into my hands- theater, academics, politics. I began to want to come into contact with these more and more, so I further narrowed the scope of my color wheel and increased the shades of my primary colors.

世界不会因为我而抛弃S，所以我试图自己抛弃S。如果我能一直忙碌，我就能远离这个“S”;如果你忙到没有晚饭时间，你就不能和“parent”(再次感谢Grammaly)一起吃饭。我把我所有的空闲时间都填满了。我被别人称为“忙碌的孩子”——每个人都问我:“你怎么有时间做那么多事情?”晨会，上课，参加课后会议，练习排球，上舞蹈课，在波士顿彩排，做家庭作业，睡觉，不断重复。随着时间的推移，虽然我的时间表在不断改变，但我还是一如既往的忙碌。我无法填补失去" S "在我生命中留下的空缺，但我至少可以确保我没有时间去想它。我的生活中有太多我无法控制的事情，所以我控制了我所能控制的——我的时间表。我从不屈服于过度忙碌带来的压力。我茁壮成长。同时参加那么多的活动对我来说是个挑战，但我很快就找到了节奏。但这个节奏不是我想要的。这个节奏中可能没有“S”，但“S”却会在我空闲的时候出现。所以，我又给自己加了一个球，一个又一个。很快，我注意到同样“颜色”的球不断落入我的手中——戏剧、学术和政治。我开始越来越想接触这些领域，所以我进一步缩小了颜色范围，注重于增加同一种颜色的不同色号。

Life became easier to juggle, but for the first time, I didn’t add another ball. I found my rhythm, and I embraced it. I stopped running away from a single “S” and began chasing a double “S”- passion. Passion has given me purpose. I was shackled to “S” as I tried to escape the confines of the traditional familial structure. No matter how far I ran, “S” stayed behind me because I kept looking back. I’ve finally learned to move forward instead of away, and it is liberating. “S” got me moving, but it hasn’t kept me going.

生活变得更容易掌控了，但第一次，我没有再为自己增加新的球。我找到了我的人生节奏，并欣然接受这个节奏。我不再逃避字母 "S"，转而开始追逐两个 "S" — “PaSSion”。热情带给我人生目标。当我试图逃避传统家庭结构的束缚时，我被困住了。不管我跑了多远，“S”总在我的背后因为我总是回头看。但我终于学会了向前看，而不是逃避。这会是一种解脱。“S”鞭策我前行，但它并没有让我一直坚持下去。

I wish I could end here, triumphant and basking in my new inspiration, but life is more convoluted. Motivation is a double edged sword; it keeps me facing forward, but it also keeps me from having to look back. I want to claim that I showed courage in being able to turn from “S”, but I cannot. Motivation is what keeps “S” at bay. I am not perfectly healed, but I am perfect at navigating the best way to heal me. I don’t seek out sadness, so “S” must stay on the sidelines, and until I am completely ready, motivation is more than enough for me.

我希望我能在这里结束，享受胜利享受我新的灵感，但生活是更复杂的东西。我的动力是一把双刃剑：它让我从过去中解脱出来。但它不会是我一直前行的动力。我想要说我拥有远离“S”的勇气，但是我不能。同时，动力缓和了我与“S”的关系。虽然我还没有完全康复，但我现在已经可以自如地寻找帮助自己修复的最佳方法。我并不是因为悲伤才驱动自己前行，所以“S”只能作为一种辅助。当我真正恢复并准备前行的那时候，我的驱动力本身，就足以作为前行的动力了。